Work/Life/Travel Balance
Back in 2019 I had a near death experience after the birth of my third child. This left me with a common feeling of an increased appreciation for life. This at first seems like a good thing, however it can overwhelm myself and my family at times. I have trouble finding a balance of rest with my thirst for my career, traveling and wanting everything else this life can offer. I can find myself filling our families’ calendar with activities, home projects, outings, vacations and various other commitments. My children are all very active and are involved in many sports, band, choir and arts in our community so as you can see, busy is our “normal”. Travel and family vacations and trips with my husband, work trips and friend trips also fill our calendar, and I’ve found myself being obsessive about what trip is coming next. Experiencing the country and new challenges and escaping to new places is so satisfying to myself and my family as well. I have found myself booking 3 family vacations this year, which is something I have never done before. I’m reevaluating myself and my constant want to travel. Family vacations are great- however balance is needed as well and contentment. In the season of life, I’m in where my husband and I are both established and working towards goals in our career along with raising a family, balance is the key during this season of life. What that exactly looks like, I am not sure. However, here are a few things I have read and put into practice in my life to aid in this battle of busy and rest.
I have recently finished the book, ‘Atomic Habits’ by James Clear where he talks about how to build good habits and break bad ones. My favorite take away is that small changes can build via the compounding effect, to create powerful results. Have I personally obtained these powerful results? No, I haven’t- yet. I like how he says, “you can’t change your life overnight, but you can change the direction.” Clear talks about how we can get 1% better or 1% worse every day by our habits and decisions we make. Another big take away from the book is his golden rule of habit change which is, “make is so that the good habit is easy to do, and the bad habit is hard to do.” The habits I am personally working to obtain are my sleep routine and my work out routine. They go hand in hand because I need a good amount of rest to feel up to a workout in the morning and the exercise helps me feel more grounded throughout the day. I feel I make better decisions, and my reasoning is better after getting a good night’s sleep and I have exercised. I use his strategy called habit stacking to obtain these goals where you put multiple habits you want to do together. So, to get a good amount of rest at night, I read 45 minutes before bed and not scroll my phone. Then to exercise I set up a space in my basement where I do my daily devotional, meditate and get 30min of exercise together. I have made both habits more attractive to me to do and I know both will make me feel better throughout the day and I’ll make better decisions.
Clear speaks on the benefits of having an organized home in the book as well. An organized and decluttered home promotes relaxation and rest in the home and a calmer environment. This is the main source of motivation for me to declutter and have a home for every item in my house. I feel the return on investment in my time and energy is great to keep a peaceful home environment (as much as possible with three kids and a husband lol). If you really get to the root of why people love to be organized- it's because we are lazy and do not like small tasks to take longer than needed. Having an organized home frees up so much time and mental energy so you can really focus on more important and bigger tasks in your day. Clear argues that it is not someone’s genes that makes them a successful, fit or organized person. Success in all areas of life comes from setting up their environment so that they’re less frequently tempted to fall from the positive habit bandwagon.
The last main point of the book that has aided in my journey to balance rest and busyness is to make goals for the year and to revisit them throughout the year. This started 2 years before the book for me personally as my husband and I would have dinner together after the new year and write down personal, professional and family goals for the year. This has aided in keeping us on the same page and help be an encouragement for each other. Having written goals and to be able to check them off at the end of the year is so satisfying for me to do, it keeps me motivated just to have the simple pleasure of checking it off my list. Checking in on our list quarterly is something new we are going to add to be more intentional and to see if any goals need to be revised or adjusted. Health, finances, time are all reasons why some goals need to be changed to better fit the direction that our year is going in.
Balance of life is very important and looks different for every person and every family. Finding it and being content in it helps reduce stress, overall well-being, productivity and greater fulfillment in life. Since 2019 I have had a strong need to find this balance of life possibly due to going from a family of 4 to a family of 5. I believe my near-death experience has also heightened my feeling for making the most out of this life and I know that finding balance will be the best way to accomplish that.
-Amber is the owner of Amber’s Home Organization and she services the Quad Cities.
